11-22-12 08:27 AM - Post#1487582    

So my brother is getting married in January, and I'm bored so I looked at the registry.

What the fuck?

Who actually wants a bread maker? YOU'LL NEVER USE IT.

They asked for a pasta maker and a ravioli maker?! I get it, she's Italian, but come on. And a pasta drying rack? WTF!!!!!!!

A Belgian waffle maker? Who the fuck makes waffles? Buy Eggos.

A plastic spaghetti server AND a wooden spaghetti server? Dude you don't run an orphanage!!

They asked for two zest graters.

They want 8 sets of flatware, 8 sets of dinnerware, but their table holds 6. ARGHHHHHHHH

And honestly, probably worst of all, they're asking for this: http://slimages.macys.com/is/image/MCY/products /5/...

Yes, that is a bowl that holds chips and dip. I'm going to kill myself.

"It is not our fault that the world is bad, and we do not want to die changing it. We want to live- that is all." -Tadeusz Borowski

11-22-12 08:46 AM - Post#1487592    

    In response to Tim-

You keep say saying "they," but in all likelihood it's actually "her." When my wife and I went to do our registry I spent the day just nodding yes. Anything I suggested gut a disapproving, "I guess we could use a kegerator, but wouldn't a crystal punch bowl and ladle be more practical?"
Eventually it just becomes "yes dear, I would love pillow shams much more than a bathroom magazine rack."

11-22-12 08:58 AM - Post#1487597    

    In response to Jax

Truthfully when I got married we had some stupid ass shit on our list to. Usually the stupider the shit is the more expensive it is. So, the week after the bridal shower we took the stupid high-priced shit back to the store and got cash back

I didn't want to even put high priced stuff on the list but our family basically forced us to saying people are gonna want to get you guys good gifts so let them buy you things at whatever price they want.

11-22-12 09:16 AM - Post#1487604    

    In response to NYR_Nutz

Just find the cheapest, chintzyest stuff on the list, buy it now before anyone else does. Job done.

"You call this bad? I'll tell you what bad is....Bad is passing test depth at 80 feet per second with a thirty degree down bubble. Compared to that, this is a walk in the park.”

11-22-12 09:31 AM - Post#1487612    

    In response to Panzerrat

I'm going to get him Ravens bed sheets or monogrammed beer glasses or something worth a damn.

"It is not our fault that the world is bad, and we do not want to die changing it. We want to live- that is all." -Tadeusz Borowski

11-22-12 10:24 AM - Post#1487635    

    In response to Tim-

LOL.

"I may be an emotional cripple but am becoming a strong, burly fucking hunk of a man." -Crowder

11-22-12 10:28 AM - Post#1487638    

    In response to Tim-

In all fairness, zesting lemon and lime with the same instrument is a tad bit passé.

When statesmen forsake their own private conscience for the sake of their public duties they lead their country by a short route to chaos. - St. Thomas More

11-22-12 10:43 AM - Post#1487644    

    In response to Kanrok

And I agree with Jax. It's pretty much whatever she wants. The bonus is, it's a bunch of stuff you will never have to buy her. I now don't have to go to Williams Sonoma and endure hearing about why we need a new set of overpriced spice rubs or ramekins.

And some of the stuff really pays off with little to no effort on your end. I know I have never once used the Kitchen Aid mixer or food processor, but I have benefitted from hundreds of culinary delights as my wife slaves away in the kitchen. I WIN!!!

"I may be an emotional cripple but am becoming a strong, burly fucking hunk of a man." -Crowder

11-22-12 11:22 AM - Post#1487647    

    In response to haymaker36

I didn't even go with the wife to do the registries. She did put some odd stuff on there, but it's typically just shit we'd never actually buy.

Best gift was a crystal decanter a buddy got me for my bourbon. Not on the registry, of course.

-PR

Eeeehhhhhhhhhhh!

11-22-12 11:32 AM - Post#1487653    

    In response to PuckRogue

Lol guys.

I hear ya Hay. But seriously a fucking bread maker? If they wanted to make bread they could've bought one. They both have good jobs so it's not a matter of money. Why do married people suddenly want shit they won't ever use?

Spice rubs? Make it yourself. Ramakins, okay that's fair if you entertain or bake a lot.

But a bowl that holds chips and salsa what thefuck???? Eat from the fucking bag.

"It is not our fault that the world is bad, and we do not want to die changing it. We want to live- that is all." -Tadeusz Borowski

11-22-12 12:36 PM - Post#1487668    

    In response to Tim-

Buddy got me a Logitech TV remote that I wasn't even registered for.

Just remember though, as far as wedding gifts, cash is king.

"Buy me a soda after the game."

11-22-12 09:52 PM - Post#1487766    

    In response to Ogie

I did not have a registry,got married in Vernon B.C. in her parents backyard.Had our family and friends there,the best gift of all.Tim- we have a breadmaker,or as I would call it,a space taker upper, stupidest fad ever.Go to a Bakery if you want the shit.Italians are fucking nuts for expensive wedding gifts.My friend married an Italian lass,you should have seen the shit they got.We had a good dinner and a night in a hotel without my oldest child.Could not ask for more.I watched Saturday night live with a bottle of Champagne while my lovely bride slept,after expressing our love for each other in a physical way,If you know what I mean.....